Coping with Job Loss and Unemployment

Losing your job is one of the most stressful life experiences … and you can get through it.

For many people, losing a job is devastating. Not only does it threaten your financial security, but it takes a toll on your emotional and physical health.

Losing your job can feel like a failure, even when it’s not your fault. It’s easy to feel helpless, hopeless, and alone.

There are times when losing a job is a relief. Maybe it gets you out of a toxic work situation or maybe you had already decided to make a job change. Even when there is a silver lining, being unemployed can still be stressful.

IF YOU HAVE LOST YOUR JOB, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

In our production-oriented society, unemployment is stigmatized. The longer people are unemployed, some hiring managers think this means there is something toxic about the person.

(It’s definitely time for employers and recruiters to get rid of these outdated ideas. I wish they would stop asking about resume “gaps” as there are a million reasons why people may be out of the paid workforce for a time, and most are personal and have nothing to do with the person’s potential to be a great employee.)

When the job market is down, the reality is that there are not enough decently-paying jobs to go around, and it can take a really long time to find your next job.

For some people, being unemployed feels like an identity they must take on, rather than being a temporary situation in which they find themselves. When asked what they do for work, they shamefully admit “I am unemployed” rather than describing their professional line of work.

Unemployment is not your job or identity. Being unemployed is simply a description of your current situation as someone who is looking for paid work.

Assess Your Survival Needs

As the initial shock of the job loss wears off, the first step is to figure out your basic survival needs. Take a look at your financial situation. Figure out how much money you have and how long you and your family can survive on those funds. If you do not have the financial resources to survive for a few months, begin the process of seeking assistance in the state in which you live.

For those in the state of Minnesota, you can find links for many local resources on the state’s unemployment insurance page.

Six Tips for Coping with Job Loss and Unemployment

Coping with job loss at any time is stressful, even if you have some savings that will sustain you for awhile. While each person’s situation is unique, here are a few tips for coping with the emotional roller coaster of job loss.

ALLOW YOURSELF TO FEEL A RANGE OF EMOTIONAL REACTIONS

It is normal to experience a wide range of emotions after you lose your job. One minute you might feel shocked, and the next you might feel angry. It is normal to feel sad, depressed, overwhelmed, fearful, and anxious.

Many people have been taught that if you feel sad or angry then you are focusing on the “negative.” Other people may try to make you feel better by saying things like “You have to stay positive” and “Focus on the future, not the past.”

It is important to allow yourself to experience these normal reactions to losing your job. Feeling angry, sad, and anxious about losing your job does NOT mean that you are not “staying positive” or are “stuck in the past” or are going crazy.

Feelings last for a short time and when you are in the midst of feeling fearful or depressed, remind yourself that while you may feel bad at this moment in time, this feeling will not last forever.

I encourage people to allow themselves time to grieve the loss of the job before jumping right into a job search.

(If the feelings of sadness, anxiety, or depression continue for many weeks, it can be helpful to speak with a mental health professional. Find a therapist through your insurance company, Psychology Today, or a Google search.)

REACH OUT TO OTHER PEOPLE

Humans are social creatures and even the most introverted of us need interaction with others. Isolation and lack of connection can increase the likelihood of experiencing depression and anxiety.

This means that it is really important to connect with other people to maintain your emotional health.

Share your job loss story with others in your life. Keeping it a secret can make it feel like it is something shameful. Sometimes we are afraid that we will burden others with our problems, but the reality is that other people want to hear what is going on and to offer their support.

Find other job loss support groups online or create your own support group by staying in touch with previous co-workers who are in your same position.

ENGAGE IN ACTIVITIES THAT CALM YOU DOWN

Being unemployed and job searching can make you feel out of control. Identify the things that make you feel better and calmer. What works for one person is different for another, so figure out what activities make you feel more anxious and which help you feel calm and centered.

Research studies consistently show the benefits of being physically active. Being in nature also has calming effects on your brain. When possible, get outside and take a walk, run, or bike ride. If you cannot get outside, try stretching, yoga, or just dancing to music to move your body.

Activities that help you “get out of your head” and temporarily turn the volume down on your anxious or depressed thoughts can be beneficial in moderation. Some people find venting their thoughts and feelings through journaling or talking to friends to be helpful. Passive activities such as watching TV, playing video games, or scrolling social media feeds can also be beneficial in moderation.

I’ll put in a plug here for the Healthy Minds App - a meditation app that offers programs to help you manage stress.

EVALUATE YOUR CAREER GOALS

You may have noticed that the first three Coping with Job Loss Tips were all about maintaining your emotional health. It’s almost impossible for most people to jump start the job search process if they haven’t taken the time to grieve the loss of the previous job (especially if you are taking care of children or others while managing the job loss right now).

It is also important to understand and accept the uncertainties of the current job market. This will help you manage your expectations for how long it may take to get reemployed.

This is a good time to pause and reflect on your career path and evaluate your goals for your working life.

• How satisfied were you with your previous job?

• Would you have stayed in this job or were you considering looking for another position?

• How satisfied are you in your career or industry? Before the job loss, were you considering a job or career transition?

• What do you want your working life to look like in two years? In five years?

Use this time to clarify career goals for yourself. Identify the aspects about your job that you enjoy and want to do more of, as well as those aspects that you do not enjoy and want to move away from. Having clarity about where you want to take your career helps you identify jobs or organizations that fit well with your skill set and network more successfully.

For those considering making a career change, there is nothing to lose in exploring your career options right now. Many online resources are available that provide free career assessments and extensive information about career paths, such as Career OneStop, Minnesota Career Force, and O*Net.

And, to put in a shameless plug, this could be a good time to explore your career path with a career counselor.

UPDATE YOUR CAREER PORTFOLIO

Whether you plan to find a similar job or are considering a career change, this is a great time to update your career portfolio.

• Resume: Pull out your most recent resume and see what needs to be updated. You can find great articles on developing your resume on Indeed, CareerOneStop, and Minnesota’s Career Force or through a LinkedIn Learning course.

• Online Profile: Take advantage of this time to update your professional profile on LinkedIn. Depending on your occupation, consider other ways that you could use social media to enhance your career profile.

• Industry Knowledge: Stay up to date in your field by catching up on professional articles, books, or other materials. Find webinars or other online trainings to develop new skills or get additional certifications. Check out online learning opportunities through your professional organizations, or through LinkedIn Learning, Coursera, and Udemy.

DEVELOP YOUR JOB SEARCH PLAN

Prepare for a Future Job Search. Use this time to develop your strategies for job searching.

• Use your network. Identify the types of organizations or companies for which you would like to work. Ask friends and family if they know people who work for those organizations and use LinkedIn to identify potential contacts. Arrange informal conversations with people who work in those organizations and ask them questions about their experience with the company.

• Explore job ads. While networking is important in the job searching process, some people may not have a strong network to rely on. Exploring job ads online can help you identify the types of positions being advertised. Create a list of online resources to check every few days for job ads. Find a mix of large job boards such as Indeed.com and USAjobs.gov, company and organization websites, and those in your specific area of interest or profession.

• Play the long game. Job searching can take a long time. While some people may find a job right away, others may be searching for months. Be mentally prepared to engage in job searching activities for a long period of time. Decide how much time you will spend on your job searching process each day and stick to a regular schedule. Try not to burn yourself out by spending a lot of time on one day and then not doing anything the next day.

Losing your job can be a stressful experience. Be kind and patient with yourself and others and take it one day at a time. You will get through this.